DRAFT 2
The leep
This is it, this is really it I'm sitting in a (really really small) (ecstremly tiny) wating room at the top of a 12m absailing tower waiting for Camren to go Down it! Come on, come on. finly after a exscroshating wait I hear a fimiler voice.
Next said Kelly. I rapidly stumbled to my feet and I started my climb to the top of the mamith ladder. I biurse in to the fresh, free, air at the top of the tower. Aaaaaaaaaa, relief at last. I lened over the side to look at the view... Woooow. What a spectacular view. "Great is it." yes, defiantly. "are you scered of heights". No, I replied. "Good".
She told me how to work the belay device. "ready to go". Definitely, I seid very unshore of the danger involved. I lent over the ege. Thump thump thump a figre apered from the little gap in the flore. It was annts. she waved her charcoal hand at me. I seid good bye. I lent back, Then it happened...
Wow! I said as I slipped like jelly of the side of the tower. Click, wizzzz, clunk. Click, wizzzz, clunk said the carobeners over and over agan like a stuck recorded. as the rope wistfily traieled thrue my vane streced hand it started to tern black. I started to enjoy my self. I briskly started to jump and hop as I descended down to the ground.
Thud, Said the ground as I plonced Down on it. Well now I no why it takes sooooo long.Well done shar wisped as she unkliped me from the jumble of belayand carobeners. Thank a lot I under my breath. I do edmit it I did do a great job didn't I. Weooooeeeeooooo screamed the sire. Feed time. all those biscuits and chocolate cake yummy!!! I defiantly dezorve these treats after all I have absailed Down a 12m tower haven't I. I'm going to sleep like a log to night.
The end
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Buddy feedfowd next time try adding more similes.
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